As I continue to live my life, I have come to realize three things that will never change about me: I will never like cheese, I will mindlessly buy any Pixar movie, and I will never believe in ghosts.
When I saw an opportunity to meet a real paranormal investigator, I immediately thought two things. One: Why would someone in that line of work not take the chance of a lifetime and call themselves a “ghost hunter,” and two: I knew I would continue being a skeptic.
Despite the fact I knew my opinion on paranormal activities would not change, I decided to go for the sake of curiosity. When I arrived, I was stunned by how many people were there, especially by how much the girls outnumbered the boys.
I wondered if believing in ghosts was an inherent difference in our genders, or if it was because the ghost hunter looked very handsome in the hippie sense of the word. Think of a cross between Jesus Christ and a member of the Manson family.
Our lecturing ghost hunter was called Christopher Moon. Seriously, Moon? Criss Angel called and he wants his “lamest name” title back. Unless of course Moon is his actual name, then I am truly sorry for comparing him to Criss Angel. That was uncalled for.
Despite his odd appearance and name, I was impressed with Moon. I always believed the stereotypes that ghost hunters were insane, which I probably believed after watching several minutes of those ghost-busting shows on TV.
However, Moon was incredibly well-spoken, and he acknowledged the side of skeptics.
Ignoring all his claims of feeling spiritual energy around him, I would say he is not only sane, but also normal. He even went into business with his dad, a skeptic, to produce a fairly balanced paranormal magazine that covers both sides of the debate.
Moon says that his magazine is the most popular paranormal magazine. I guess that is an accomplishment, but the value of it is lost on people who weren’t even aware these magazines existed.
I went into this speech prepared to hear some good ghost stories. Though I don’t believe in ghosts, I acknowledge that there are a lot of interesting ghost tales. If there weren’t, people wouldn’t be so fascinated with them.
Moon did not disappoint, as he continued for more than an hour detailing many of his encounters. He would play audio clips, show pictures and explain how he is currently close to breaking a cold case just by listening to the dead. That sounds ridiculous, but it was surprisingly believable and terrifying.
The best story he told, though, was of his encounters with the dad of Lizzy Borden. Even I was aware of the story of Lizzy Borden, a girl who murdered both her parents with an axe. Moon claimed he had many interactions with the father of Lizzy, Andrew Borden, who was by no means Casper the Friendly Ghost.
Many of the tales he told ended with actual physical violence, like when he felt he couldn’t breathe in his sleep, and the next morning, he had rope burns around his neck (cue X-Files music).
Following his presentation, while I did enjoy his tales, and I can completely understand why people would believe this stuff, I left how I predicted: Skeptical.
I had several concerns with all this stuff. Mainly, why would Moon heavily rely on a recording device created by a man that even Moon acknowledged to have a probable mental illness?
Honestly, maybe I don’t believe in ghosts because I have hopes that any life after this is not as miserable as the lives of these ghosts. From what I gathered after listening to the presentation, every single ghost is unable to speak unless his voice is captured on very specific recording devices and must resort to moving silverware to get some attention.
These ghosts cannot move on until they come to peace with themselves, and that “peace” involves bearing their souls to random people carrying night-vision cameras, who probably spend their vacations searching for Bigfoot in the Appalachians and who spend their weekends hoping to experience a paranormal event that they can post on YouTube in hopes it goes viral. Is that what we want for our loved ones or ourselves?
You believe what you want, but I will continue to hope for an afterlife where I am reincarnated as an eagle.
Dennis Fulton is a senior studying journalism at Ohio University and a columnist for The Post. Do you believe in ghosts? Email Dennis at df342709@ohiou.edu.
