Ah, to be a 20-year-old girl. Classes, internships, going out with your friends and having someone shove a metal tool in your vagina and have a little look around in there.
Yesterday, I had my first sit in the ol’ stirrups and I was terrified, but remain thankful that I went. The goal of this column is to take the mystery and fear away from the gynecologist for those who have yet to make their first visit.
I was examined by a nurse practitioner, who came in to chat with me beforehand.
I asked her questions about birth control options. The IUD came up which she warned can have a painful insertion process. I took this as a good time to tell her I am sensitive to pain in my vagina and would prefer something else. She nodded but didn’t ask any questions as we discussed other options.
At this moment, I appreciated that I was speaking to someone who had gone to school specifically to help women. I didn’t need to explain anything to anyone.
After this, the practitioner asked me if I would like to see the speculum.
To completely level with you, the speculum is the freakiest looking “50 Shades Darker” type of thing I have ever seen and I was truly frightened by it. Still, I decided yes, I would like to see the tools, information is power, yada yada yada.
At this point, the nurse practitioner said there was a student who had been shadowing her through some exams and asked if I would be comfortable with the student doing my examination under her supervision. She was very gentle with the suggestion and I felt no pressure to answer one way or another. I told her that I wouldn’t mind.
The nurse practitioner soon left the room so I could undress from the waist down. A few minutes later the nurse practitioner knocked and came in with the student, also a woman. My lower half was covered with a paper sheet.
I was instructed to put my feet on the infamous stirrups, scoot my butt to the edge of the table, lay back and let my knees fall to each side. It was time for the pelvic exam.
At this stage, it is important to focus as much as you can on your breathing. In my experience, if you’re anxious then your body is tense, including your vagina, which makes it harder to stretch and heightens the chances of pain and discomfort both during sex and at the gynecologist.
The nurse practitioner narrated everything she and the student were doing to make sure I was comfortable. She announced that the student would be using the speculum to check on the walls of my vagina and my cervix. As it was inserted there was some discomfort but no pain.
However, the student was having a hard time finding my cervix and it began to hurt a bit and I felt the anxiety kick in. The nurse practitioner noticed this and quickly took over.
She soon announced that my cervix sits low in my body, which she said is fine because the positioning of the cervix varies from person to person. This was the most helpful piece of information I gained from my trip, as there have been several times I have experienced sudden pain during sex that sent me into a panic attack in seconds. I now know that this pain was the result of my partner hitting my cervix at a weird angle.
I was then swabbed with a long cotton swab for an STD test and the speculum was removed. It all took maybe a minute or two tops. Next, the nurse practitioner inserted her finger into my vagina to feel for any abnormalities. None of this hurt or was uncomfortable. Soon enough, the examination was done.
Ultimately I am extremely grateful that I went in. I got answers about my anatomy that will save me immense discomfort in the future and felt incredibly safe and comfortable in the space. As intimidating as the gynecologist is, it is extremely important to stay a step ahead of your sexual health and understand your body.
BedPost is a sex and relationship column that does not reflect the views of The Post.
