“Terrible night” the tweet said, accompanied by a disappointed emoji and zero likes. The tweet, which took me nearly a half second to read (and another half second to scroll past) was significant only in that it was the fourth tweet of its kind that I had seen in 10 minutes.
Originally, this column was going to be a rant against subtweeting. That is, until I realized the entire column would essentially be a massive subtweet. Instead, I’m taking aim at the weird melodramatic tweets that fill everyone’s timeline because everyone tweets them.
These tweets — melodramatic, sad and vague — are like cockroaches; for every one that is scrolled past, two more appear in its place. They are so common, so liked and so universally annoying that I couldn’t help but write an equally annoying column against them.
Let me be very clear: the only things people on twitter care about are funny tweets and dogs. No one cares about the other vague, depressing posts clouding their timeline.
Arguably the worst part about these tweets is they put every single person who reads them in an awkward position.
“Terrible night.”
Do I like it? Do I ignore it? Do I reply to it and say how annoying it is? Suddenly I’m wrenched away from a timeline of news and jokes and into a limbo of awkward social media decisions.
The tweets usually fall into two categories: sad and straightforward or dramatic and sarcastic.
“I love feeling (insert something the writer doesn't love feeling here).”
“I can’t deal with (some other negative thing).”
"Smh" — just smh, that's the whole tweet.
“Blah blah blah.”
It’s like watching someone shout their complaints at the night sky. They’re getting it off their chest, but they aren’t really shouting it at anyone who cares.
I promise that reaching out to a human who will actually listen, rather than a human who will scroll past your tweet, will help you more than screaming into the void.
— Bennett Leckrone is a sophomore studying journalism at Ohio University. Please note that the views and opinions of the columnists do not reflect those of The Post. Want to stress out Bennett? Tweet him melodramatic things @LeckroneBennett.
