I miss driving through Nelsonville
Dear Editor,
On a recent trip to Athens I was devastated to find that a very inconvenient new bypass on Route 33 has redirected my usually scenic and thoroughly enjoyable drive through Nelsonville. I love traveling through that town and seeing the old sights, like the furniture store that’s always having a sale and the boarded-up Shell station. I found the 35 mph speed limit and successive traffic lights a refreshing change of pace that broke up my monotonously smooth journey down the highway. I hope students and alumni boycott this bypass and opt for the Nelsonville detour. What do you need another 15 minutes for anyway?
Sincerely, Franny Tick
Upset that journalist quoted me accurately
Dear Editor,
Who do you people think you are? Last weekend one of your reporters came up to me, identified herself as a writer from The Pest, asked me a question (which I answered) and then asked me how to spell my name, but I never expected any of that conversation to be published in the newspaper. You had no right to do that. I thought the reporter and I were just having a casual chat and that she was taking notes for her own personal use. I was shocked to find my words quoted accurately and attributed properly in one of your so-called “articles.” How dare you use information that I voluntarily provided you with and expressed no concerns about at the time? You should be ashamed of yourselves for practicing such irresponsible journalism.
Sincerely, Sams P. Ants
My public dancing should be private
Dear Editor,
I’m very upset that you posted a picture of me dancing in the middle of the street. I never expected my name and face to be associated with something I did in a public place, and I certainly never expected that the photographer who came up to me, told me he worked for your newspaper and asked for my name had intended to print my picture and put it online. I demand you take it down immediately before I sue you for slander.
Sincerely, Grant Willikers
Residence hall bats have feelings too
Dear Residents of
Washington Hall,
I just don’t understand the complete lack of decency with which students treat the nocturnal flying mammal community.
I mean, you guys are all awake blasting your damn music and running around when we’re asleep, so I don’t see a problem if one of us decides to poke our head out or make some commotion as we fly around in the roof at 2 a.m.
Also, stop screaming at the sight of us. Think you’re something pretty to look at? Puh-lease. I’ve seen pigeons with better wingspans.
Sincerely,
The Washington Hall Bats
