The absolute worst games for the N64.
In my last column, I wrote about the cool, revolutionary Nintendo 64 and the three greatest games for that system. I mentioned that there may be 200 good games, but for every one of those, there are at least 10 horrible ones. Of course, that's all subjective. Maybe one of my least favorite titles is one you hold near and dear. If that's the case, you have my deepest condolences, because here are the absolute worst games for the N64:
At the time, "Quest 64" seemed like a good idea. It was one of the first role playing games (RPGs) for the system, and in that regard, it was kind of cool, but then people started playing it. I remember my cousin playing it. He wouldn't let me touch it — he thought I would ruin his save file, or something. Had I known how awful it was, I just might have.
From the camera that does little to help you to the skewed leveling system (it literally takes 24-plus hours of playing to increase your skills even marginally) and the tired, unimaginative attacks, this game is very disappointing. RPGs should be tedious, yes, but they should never feel tedious. Add that to the collect-four-elemental-stones-and-save-the-land schtick (where haven't I heard THAT one before?) and this game just isn't worth the time.
Speaking of not worth the time, "Glover" is another game that isn't. It's about a glove… that comes to life… and there's a wizard and a red and yellow ball straight out of Toy Story rolling around sometimes. Yeah, the mechanics are somewhat unique, but they are executed so horribly that you don't even have time to appreciate what's special about this game. It shouldn't be difficult to move around and occasionally use the glove to direct the ball to complete certain objectives. But it is. And that is what breaks this game.
I should preface this last one with this: You think you like Superman. You may think that he's the best. Something about his near indestructibility and big red S constitutes no parallel. He's cool. He's tough. He's an idol. He couldn't possibly be associated with anything awful, right?
Wrong. That is very, very wrong.
"Superman 64" has been universally panned as one, if not the, worst game ever made, and for good reason. Its graphics are primitive, and not in a good early-gems-of-the-N64 way. It’s as if the makers of the game didn't even try.
The levels repeat after a while, and they’re either so glitchy that they break the game, make the level loop or drag on forever. Anyone who knows anything about the dark side of gaming knows about the rings in "Superman 64." The long trail of rings you must fly through, and that is the level. No fights, no action, no threat. Just rings that you must navigate for ten minutes to no music.
At least the other games had music, and textures (even though they belonged more in a Windows 98 screensaver than in a game, but at least they were trying). This game is lifeless, and if you own it, please don't think it's the greatest thing ever. It isn't. It really isn't.
What happens in the dark age of the Nintendo 64 should stay there.
Hailey Bibbee is a freshman studying English and creative writing. What was the worst video game you’ve ever played? Email her at hb398213@ohio.edu.
