As students in college navigate the hardships of romantic love, academics and everything in between all while adjusting to completely new years of life, it is worth remembering what these years are made for: friendships. Dolly Alderton’s “Everything I Know About Love” encapsulates the beauty of college friendships, providing needed reminders and uplifting students.
A study by The Knot, a wedding planning site, reported that 15 percent of couples met in college. Although this may not seem high, it makes college one of the most likely places to meet a spouse. Most students at Ohio University likely – at least – have one friend in a relationship. It can cause uncertainty for the friendship, but Alderton reminds young women in this situation that circumstances of friendships can change without love disappearing.
Alderton wrote, “I would like to pause the story a moment to talk about ‘nothing will change.’ I’ve heard it said to me repeatedly by women I love during my twenties when they move in with boyfriends, get engaged, move abroad, get married, get pregnant. ‘Nothing will change.’ It drives me bananas. Everything will change. Everything will change. The love we have for each other stays the same, but the format, the tone, the regularity and the intimacy of our friendship will change forever.”
While navigating friendships with women who are in relationships, Alderton provides a necessary reminder that students are experiencing the natural course of their twenties. However, there is reassurance in accepting change while being committed to upholding friendships.
According to Pew Research Center, 61 percent of U.S. adults reported that having close friendships is necessary to live a fulfilling life. Garnering lower than half of that percentage, only 23 percent reported the same about being married.
Watching romantic relationships flourish can be difficult for those not in one, but this study emphasizes the importance of focusing on friendships. Alderton speaks to this by describing the love that exists within friendships that can often be overlooked when dwelling on a lack of romantic love.
Alderton said, “When you’re looking for love and it seems like you might not ever find it, remember you probably have access to an abundance of it already, just not the romantic kind. This kind of love might not kiss you in the rain or propose marriage. But it will listen to you, inspire and restore you. It will hold you when you cry, celebrate when you’re happy, and sing All Saints with you when you’re drunk. You have so much to gain and learn from this kind of love. You can carry it with you forever. Keep it as close to you as you can.”
Not only does the love between friends foster a sense of comfort and support, but it also teaches people about love – which is reflected in their other relationships.
Alderton’s “Everything I Know About Love” is a must-read for college students. Her stories and eloquent wording offers a special perspective on circumstances students in their twenties are experiencing and will experience – with appreciating friendships as a main theme.
Layne Rey is a junior studying journalism at Ohio University. Please note that the views and opinions of the columnist do not reflect those of The Post. What are your thoughts? Let Layne know by tweeting her @laynerey12.
