Early adulthood is consistently characterized as years of loneliness. Leaving or being left by those you love to further education, work or even other relationships is inherently lonely. However, there is so much love to be found during these years – and not in the way that is most likely front-of-mind.
There is an underlying pressure to follow the unspoken timeline of romantic love during these years. The immediately meeting someone in a new place to falling in love and getting married trope is far more dreamy than it is realistic. The pressure to find a romantic partner is high and heavy. Dreams do come true though, for some.
As for me, I have chosen to focus on a different kind of love in my life that is just as deserving of finding and experiencing during early adulthood. I’ve realized that good platonic friendships are invaluable to me at this age.
Platonic love is arguably more beautiful of a concept than romantic love. A relationship that cannot be rooted in sex appeal or the sole desire to be loved romantically is unwaveringly more comforting for me right now. That’s not to say that all or any romantic relationships are surface-level; it is to say that platonic relationships simply can’t be.
Platonic friendships are beautiful in the sense that there is a mutual desire to just be around or in contact with one another. It is purely an emotional connection.
Romantic love is usually spawned over the good part of a lifetime in a society where you live and raise children with a romantic partner. However, platonic love absolutely has peaks. The number of good platonic relationships at any given moment is typically based on situational factors.
It only makes sense that young adulthood will bring about many platonic relationships — whether they are continued from the past or developed in new circumstances. I think that’s worth appreciating at the moment rather than dwelling on forms of love that may be lacking.
As a self-proclaimed, chronically single friend, I have heard time and time again to enjoy this time in my life. Eventually, I had no choice but to just listen.
There is so much peace in knowing that perhaps this time in my life is actually meant to be spent loving and being loved platonically. Romantic love will come.
I watch my mom hang out with her friends from college now and then as they are consumed with their outside lives. Nothing makes me want to appreciate experiencing an abundance of platonic love right now more than that.
What I lack in romantic love is made up a million times over in platonic love. Lacking any kind of love — platonic, romantic or self — is not a fault. In fact, it opens room for even more love in the other forms.
A balance between all kinds of love would be ideal, but who’s that lucky?
This Valentine’s Day, love those who love you – in whatever way that may be.
Layne Rey is a sophomore studying journalism at Ohio University. Please note that the views and opinions of the columnist do not reflect those of The Post. What are your thoughts? Let Layne know by tweeting her @laynerey12.
