Some couples love Valentine’s Day and all the lovey-dovey activities the day brings, but new relationships can feel strained with pressure of making the perfect holiday. New partners should be focused on getting to know each other, but the day calls for red roses, dark chocolate and expensive jewelry.
While it may be difficult to avoid these societal expectations, there are ways to deal with the anxieties new couples face. Here are some tips on how to celebrate Valentine’s Day with that new special someone in your life:
Talk to your significant other in advance about the holiday
Before planning or expecting anything, you should have a conversation with your partner. Each of you should explain how you feel and what you want from the holiday. Set a plan together and agree on what you both want the day to look like. You may even choose to not celebrate at all. This should all be the result of a discussion with your special someone.
Don’t set too high of expectations
Try not to come in with preset notions of what Valentine’s Day should look like. You’re still learning what your partner likes and dislikes, and you may be disappointed if you set extreme expectations for a relationship you’re still learning about.
Don’t compare yourself and your relationship to others and their relationships
Each relationship looks different. How you and your partner choose to celebrate may be completely different from your parents, friends or favorite celebrity couple. You should do what you want, not what you see others doing. And remember: Social media posts don’t provide the whole story. What you see online might not be realistic, especially for you and your new partnership.
Don’t abandon old Valentine’s Day traditions
Before you had a romantic relationship, you probably made Valentine's Day traditions with friends and family. Don’t cancel those plans because you feel obligated to celebrate the holiday with your new significant other. Talk to them about it and decide how you can celebrate with all those close to you. The holiday is about spreading love to everyone you care about, so don’t forget to celebrate with your friends and family, too.
Make it fun; don’t put a bunch of pressure on making the day perfect
This holiday is all about having a good, love-filled day with the person, or people, you care about. Make it what you want it to be. Don’t do anything that you wouldn't enjoy, and don’t put pressure on making the day perfect. What works for you may not be what society expects, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Enjoy the holiday, and have a fun day of love.
BedPost is a relationship column that does not reflect the views of The Post.
