Dear BedPost,
So, I’ve recently slowly started to like someone. He’s awesome. He’s very much emotionally mature and that’s something that I consider a rarity.
The only problem is, he’s two years younger than me. I’m currently a junior and he’s a freshman. I’ve expressed my worries to my friends and they think it’s OK for me to date him. However, my guy friends called me a “cougar” for even considering the matter. What should I do?
Dear reader,
Aaliyah once said, “age ain’t nothin’ but a number,” and, barring illegal circumstances, I must say I agree with her. I think it’s the age of your personality that ultimately matters — unless you can’t remember or recite the entire Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song...
In all honesty, there are some challenges that come with dating someone younger than you are. There are different goals, different life experiences and differing levels of maturity. But, all of these vary person to person, so if you feel that he’s emotionally more “mature” than his age, then rock on with your bad self.
What does bother me, however, is the idea of a “cougar.” Provided you aren’t a giant jungle cat, I don’t think it’s possible for a junior in college to be considered a cougar. I highly doubt you want to date him simply because he’s younger, because you’re young yourself. Being more than 50-years-old is kind of a necessary condition for being a cougar. Otherwise, you can tell your friend, that it’s just called dating.
Save that cougar title for Courtney Cox and her giant glass of wine, thank you very much.
Kristin Salaky is a junior studying journalism and Culture Editor for The Post.
My advice for the situation you find yourself in is going to make me sound like a total mom: don’t let the other kids get you down.
If you’re having a good time with this guy and you two care about each other, there’s no reason a relationship between the two of you would be weird or out of the question.
This isn’t high school anymore; you two aren’t 17 and 14, you’re both of legal age in all 50 states and not by much in either case. You’ve both gotten to the point in life at which ,“My parents aren’t the same age” can start being a sort of valid argument for age difference in your relationships.
Your guy friends who accuse you of cougar-ship are almost certainly just joking around. The term “cougar” is usually used in relation to women much older than 20 or 21, an age I assume of you since you’re a junior. If you can still be some rich old steel baron’s creepily young trophy wife, no one can call you a cougar for dating someone two years younger than yourself.
Looking at your scenario, I cannot think of any reason why it would be a bad idea or weird to date this guy. If you think he likes you too and you can muster the courage to ask him out, the age difference isn’t an issue.
Ian Ording is a junior studying journalism. Have a cougar you want to tame? Email us at thebedpostpeople@gmail.com.
