Two weeks ago, something monumental happened: White House Chief Beekeeper Charlie Brandts retired. Which means that, for the aspiring beekeepers at OU looking for greener pastures, have at it! REPRESENT!
White House beekeeping is one of the youngest of the presidential odd jobs in the stagnant streets of D.C. — the position of White House beekeeper was established in 2009. Brandts, who was actually the White House carpenter at the time, had been in the beekeeping business as a hobby for just three years.
When Brandts mentioned the idea of White House-made organic honey, word spread to Michelle Obama and White House Chef Sam Kass, both of whom agreed to the idea immediately. Brandts then brought in a beehive from his own garden.
Whereas the first family was enthusiastic about the idea, others were not so happy. Specifically, the White House security guards expressed the most pointed concern about being stung by bees and had to be personally convinced by Brandts.
At any rate, within three years, Brandts had raised some 70,000 bees on the White House lawn that produce about 340 pounds of honey per year.
When asked how the White House would handle the bees during events like the annual Easter Egg Roll on the White House grounds, officials stated that they would keep the bees inactive by spraying them with cool water.
For those of you who don’t like bees, there are other ways of getting to work at the White House. I myself plan to apply to be the White House executive pastry chef, because of my superior qualifications. The White House executive pastry chef and his assistant pastry chef specialize entirely in making delicious cakes and cookies and tasty sugary things.
The biggest project that the pastry chefs face each year is the much-anticipated gingerbread house around Christmas time. Just this past year alone, the 2012 White House gingerbread house used 175 pounds of gingerbread held together by 50 pounds of chocolate. Overall, the dessert weighed about 300 pounds.
The chefs paid particular attention to recreating every minute detail of the White House in their creation, putting in elaborate chandeliers, furniture, tables, couches and pictures that matched real life.
And to touch the piece up, the chefs also constructed a replica of Bo, the Obamas’ dog, out of marzipan, along with a chocolate Santa Claus and reindeers on the roof of the White House.
The White House gingerbread project was then displayed publicly, and an estimated 90,000 visitors got to pass by and marvel at how beautiful it was.
But when all was said and done, the 300-some hours’ worth of pastry work ended up eaten by the first family and White House staff. The sofas were devoured, as were the chandeliers. And so was Santa Claus. And the reindeer. And the marzipan version of Bo the dog.
Perhaps the White House could find a better use for the gingerbread White House, such as selling it as a fundraiser for a kind cause. Although gingerbread is far more attractive than bees are, one must admit that making organic honey is a sounder cause than pretty pastries.
Of course, we haven’t talked about the best job of all — being the First Dog! Bo gets to eat delicious things all the time just for being the president’s puppy. Michelle Obama says Bo’s favorite food is tomatoes, and special “Bo” cookies are prepared for White House receptions.
Too bad I can’t apply to be the First Dog. I like tomatoes too, you know.
Kevin Hwang is a senior at Athens High School who is taking classes at Ohio University and a columnist for The Post. What position would you like to have at the White House? Email Kevin at kh319910@ohiou.edu.
