As we prepared for this week’s column, we asked ourselves some questions. With only a few weeks left, what beers or kinds of beer have we neglected? Would every potential beer drinker want to read our columns, or have we descended into hop-head madness? Are we doing justice to the diversity of beer available in this state?
Because we weren’t happy with the answers to some of these questions, we decided to do something different. We’re reviewing a wheat beer all the way from Colorado: the Jack Whacker Wheat from Tommy Knocker Brewery.
We found Jack Whacker being sold in bottles on the brewery side of Jackie O’s, which by now you know is our favorite haunt. It pours poorly, with a yellow color and relatively no head. From the start, it looks watery. This does not bode well.
Jack Whacker is described as an ale fermented with lemongrass on one part of its bottle, and as a wheat beer with lemony-citrus on another part. And yes, it smells and tastes like lemon. In fact, it only tastes like lemon.
While the lemon is nice, the Jack Whacker made us ask a question nobody ever wants to hear: Where’s the beer? Some people put lemon in their water when they go out to eat; maybe Jack Whacker had the same idea? The only time it feels the need to remind you that it’s beer is in the aftertaste, which reminds us of all those Pabsts we drank before we discovered craft beer.
The Jack Whacker makes us sad. It makes us sad because beer can be so much better. Even wheat beers can be so much better. We love the idea of adding citrus flavors to beer, but it’s a damn shame that Jack Whacker tastes like Tommy Knocker forgot to put the beer in their lemon water. If you see this brew at a bar, move along. If you see this brew in a store, do the world a favor and tell an employee that they should move the six-packs to the flavored-water section.
Jared Henderson and Patty Arnold are seniors studying philosophy
and biological science, respectively, at Ohio University and columnists for The Post. Email them at jh350409@ohiou.edu and pa803908@ohiou.edu.
