Well, it finally reached above 50 degrees last week and consistently poured rain.
You know what that means, right? It’s time to put those textbooks on the backburner and break out the flip-flops.
Wait, that’s not right. Those textbooks would burn and flip-flops can be worn in any weather.
Whatever.
My point is that the quarter is wrapping up and it’s almost spring break. To close my list, I finish with my 10th sign that I am for sure in college and not some other circus: the two different ways college students spend spring break.
The first way is the one that makes headlines and provides material for poorly made musical comedies that star Kelly Clarkson and that other guy that almost won American Idol.
What, you’ve never seen From Justin to Kelly? That’s cinematic gold you’re missing.
It’s spring break in a nutshell, minus the spot-on choreography.
So around this time, college adventure-lovers escape from what my dad calls the four seasons of Ohio: almost winter, winter, still winter and construction.
It usually consists of a mass migration to MTV’s favorite locations — Myrtle Beach, Panama City or anywhere else that has lots of neon and mini-golf courses with poor combinations of volcanoes and pirate ships.
If anyone is planning on spending his or her break in Fairbanks, Alaska … well, I apologize.
These spring break traditions are also never complete without the three A’s: alcohol, alcohol and what’s that last one?
Aerobics? No silly, alcohol. That’s just absurd.
These are the best days of our lives after all. We Ohio college students need a break from the lull of gray skies, rain and cold that overshadows our fine state.
But if you read several weeks ago about being a broke college student, you’ll understand it when I say that, by now, many of us have a balance on our bank accounts that would surely lose us a game of Monopoly.
Because, if college was like Monopoly, the majority of us would be sitting on the dark-purple property of poverty called Mediterranean Avenue while selling our souls to that evil space with the faucet on it.
So if you’re in this type of shape, you’re heading into spring break with the mindset that it’s a whole week and that you can either work yourself to the bone or at least let the parents take you out for a dinner that doesn’t come wrapped in foil.
That’s how I’m spending it, at least. No Panama City for me. I’ll be waking up to serve oatmeal to the penny-pinching old folks so I can stock up on money for next quarter while “She Works Hard for the Money” by Donna Summer plays in the back of my mind.
No ma’am, I will not forget the brown sugar.
If it tempts you, hop on that plane to Myrtle. You will have fun. But there shouldn’t be any pressure against just going home for this coveted vacation week.
People are always saying college doesn’t last forever. They’re right; it doesn’t.
But last time I checked, you’re allowed to go on vacation post-graduation too.
And rumor has it, if you do, you might still have money left over afterward for other cool stuff, like food and electric bills.
Happy spring break, Ohio University. Enjoy yourselves.
Jackie Runion is a sophomore studying journalism and a columnist for The Post. Send her your spring-break plans at jr178409@ohiou.edu.
